Pat – Page 4 – No Hate No Violence

Hate or Happiness? It’s A Choice.

We at NoHateNoViolence.com want to say that Hate is a choice not an emotion. That important distinction sometimes gets lost when we see hate-filled peoples’ faces in crowds contorted with what may look like emotion. It isn’t. It is their soul showing on their face. The more we all understand this the more we all might think about how to minimize hateful thoughts, comments and behaviors.

Happiness is also a choice, and no matter where we are in life, we should try for happiness in every living moment. Being happy as much as possible in life means quite simply that a person feels better and finds it harder to express Hate in thought, word or deed!

We would like to share this article by Kimberly Mikesh with you – perhaps it will help you find a little more happiness to share with others today!

“While some factors that affect happiness are out of our control (yes, genetics does play a role, as do current life circumstances), there are always actions we can take to amp up our good vibes. Consider trying a few of these – or all of them! – and you’re guaranteed to give your day a little boost.
1. Crank the tunes. Try NOT smiling while blasting your fave feel-good song (or 5).
2. Write it down. Did you know that taking the time to write down 3 positive things each day will make you more optimistic and less stressed? (And yes, we have an app for that 🙂
3. Get outside. Just a few minutes of fresh air can give you a fresh perspective.
4. Walk it out. A 20-minute brisk walk gets the heart pumping and will decrease stress.
5. Make a statement. With your accessories. A bold statement necklace, your too-cool-for-school shades or your favorite kicks can be all you need to turn a ‘blah’ day around.
6. Give yourself a boost. Of healthy nutrients! We’re talking fruit, veggies and protein. When your body feels good your brain will follow.
7. Leave a note. Make someone’s day by leaving a “you’re beautiful” note on the bathroom mirror.
8. Do something. Whether it’s sending an email or clearing the clutter off your dining room table, just getting one tiny little thing off your to-do list and onto the ‘it’s done’ list will give you a huge mental sigh of relief.
9. Say “thank you.” Even this small act of gratitude will boost your positivity.
10. Learn something new. Whether it’s reading a wiki about a topic that interests you or watching a quick Youtube tutorial, the digital world is full of ways to learn things fast and on the go. Yes, even happiness courses! 🙂
11. Be a good listener. Seeking out meaningful conversation is proven to improve your sense of well-being.
12. Let it go. You can boost your happiness by detaching from past negativity.
13. Straighten up! Our posture dictates how we feel, so straighten up and walk like a boss!
14. Try something new. Break out of your routine and mix things up! It can be as simple as walking down a different street – anything to just get off of autopilot and be present where you are.
15. Spend money. The trick is you have to spend it on someone else to get the ‘feel good’ perks, according to Harvard professor Mike Norton.
16. Text a friend. Reaching out to a pal and letting them know how awesome they are will make you feel awesome, too.
17. Make plans. Having something to look forward to, even something small like making plans to grab a cup of coffee with a friend, makes you happier. Anticipation is like a secret weapon of happiness.
18. Help someone. Feeling down? One of the quickest ways to pick yourself back up is to do something kind for someone else. Bonus feel good points when it’s random and not expected of you.
19. Stop comparing yourself. Chances are you always pick those at the very top to compare yourself to. No wonder you feel like you’ve come up short! Focusing on the things you’ve accomplished is a lot more productive.
20. Smile. In one research study subjects who smiled after a stressful activity decreased their heart rate more quickly than those who didn’t. It even works if you fake smile!
21. Power color. While we’re partial to orange of course, whatever your favorite color is, embrace it. Bonus: when you’re feeling down, treat yourself to a flower in your fave color. It will brighten the room and your outlook.
22. Treat yourself. Sometimes a tiny little luxury in our day is all we need to break out of a rut.
23. Read something. Be it your favorite guilty-pleasure celeb gossip mag or nerding out on your favorite blog, taking a few moments to indulge in something you truly enjoy will give you a burst of positive energy. Plus you might learn something (refer to #10).
24. Cute overload. Seeing something cute makes us smile which in turn makes us happier. The Cute Emergency twitter feed will rescue a bad day as quickly as you can say “Golden Retriever puppy.”
25. Think positive. No matter how bad things may seem, be grateful. Warm water on a cold day? Amazing! Cold water on a warm day? Incredible! You really are very lucky when you get right down to it.”

Another Example Of Runaway Hate

We at NO HATE NO VIOLENCE don’t have an opinion on acts of the President, but do think we should not have such hateful dialogue because it’s dividing our country.

The Impeachment process and the State of the Union, are great examples of this strategy at work. Some of our leaders use of intolerance and hate to advance their agenda is disgraceful.

We need much more respectful dialogue with honest facts by all parties.

We need to unite this country by being more tolerant, and get back to respectful debating of real issues, like our forefathers did, and like they clearly expected (the Constitution!) those that followed them would do the same.

The time and money just wasted on an impeachment is wrong, when it was clear that the President would be acquitted from the beginning. Hateful politics only divides our leaders and our country.

Thank God the voters see that HATE is not the answer – honest debate will produce much happier and better results. Remember – happiness isn’t an emotion – it’s a choice.

NO HATE NO VIOLENCE

Our Finger On The Hate Button

The other day, I was in the grocery store wearing my hat (the hat pictured above), and a young employee in their thirties gave me the finger. So, I walked over to him, who was about 20 feet away, and said, “Either you can’t read or you’re very lucky I believe in what this hat represents.” He then apologized and explained that he assumed it represented something else.

That incident made me realize how quickly our “hate button” can be pushed. Instead of instantly hating something, we should question why we feel that way. It’s astonishing to think that people and families now hate each other because of their political beliefs. When you read it, it sounds crazy, but it’s happening. We can attribute this divisiveness to politicians on both sides who perpetuate hate in order to gain support. They encourage us to hate the other side and vote for them. It has become an industry.

The truth is, 80% of Americans, regardless of party affiliation, want to be moderate. However, they allow the extreme left and right to dictate the agenda because they are either misinformed or afraid to speak up. As a Conservative Democrat, I believe our party is particularly guilty of fostering hatred. Abraham Lincoln once said, “I hate that guy, I need to get to know him better,” recognizing the destructive nature of hate. This is especially true for politicians. After all, wars have been waged due to hatred, and no war is ever good. Just look at the mess we’ve created around the world. While World Wars I and II may have had some justification, I am grateful to all the patriots who fought and died in all our wars. I believe their sacrifices will not be in vain because we have given the world a taste of freedom and democracy, which will benefit future generations in those countries. Above all else, I am proud of our military. Without them, we would not be the country that everyone, especially our own politicians, wants to destroy, even though I am a Democrat.

If you only watch news media that aligns with your own views and makes you comfortable, you are not truly watching the news. Instead, you are consuming politically correct commentary that tells you what you want to hear. A significant 72% of people in this country believe that political correctness is a problem. It’s important to express your own thoughts respectfully and gain the respect of others. Also, try watching the news from other channels occasionally. You might actually learn something and realize how similar we are. Most importantly, practice tolerance, as it goes a long way in preventing hatred.

Let’s lighten up and think before we resort to hate. At No Hate No Violence, we know that practicing this will lead to greater happiness and create a better world.

Sincerely,

Pat Lockhart
CEO & Founder

Depression, there is a way out.

If we don’t have depression ourselves, we all know somebody who does and know there are answers to battling depression and that there is a way out. I strongly suggest you give this video a try. It is on depression and how simple some people have been able to change the angle on how they deal with their depression.

Watch Here:

Johann Hari | TEDGlobalLondon

Some people require medication and some people think they require medication. I love the idea and power in meeting in a group with people who are battling similar issues as you. He shows how you can get together as a group, kind of like AA, which has been instrumental for my recovery as an alcoholic and it’s got no professionals in it helping whatsoever just a bunch of alcoholics that talk to one another. It’s by far the most successful way to deal with alcoholism for some people. Not everybody makes it, but when people battling a similar problem, whether it be alcoholism or depression come together and form a tribe and talk with each other it creates a better path for success. Having a variety of people that are at different mile markers with their depression makes for a strong and supportive tribe. You can’t just have people who are in the trenches of their depression, you also need those who’ve found a way out to help guide the others.

Most of us are depressed because of some kind of anxiety or situation that we are in, could be our job, could be from watching too much news or feeling like you are alone. This can create anxiety that leads to depression and believe it or not there’s people in this country that hate each other for having different beliefs. People should be able to believe in other things than you and without ending your friendship. This movement is about changing our thinking and having a more positive attitude (please see attitude article, it’s a big part of our No Hate No Violence movement).

I haven’t had feelings of depression for a long time since I created a positive attitude, even in bad situations I look for solutions. I don’t sit and dwell, and if I don’t like the politics of the person I’m talking to, we just debate. I love debating but not arguing, because I’m not trying to change their opinion. I just make sure I am listening and hear their thoughts and ideas. I make sure never to overreact to whatever it’s about, so I stay pretty calm all day. Now in my younger days, I would get frustrated, I’d have anxiety, I’d have upset stomachs, which would lead to depression which would lead to drinking and if I wasn’t self-medicating I would have some psychiatrist or psychologist giving me medications to numb me.

Now I don’t want any of you thinking it won’t get better as you get older because it does. If, you take to right steps in helping yourself. Listen to his two videos and I highly recommend if you have a relative or a friend or somebody you know struggling have them read this article. It’s a good thing to talk with others that have your same problem, especially if they have found solutions, and let them show.

Really listen to these speeches because they are very thought provoking.

Stop Thinking Do Something!

Give us your thoughts

San Francisco: A Great Example of Political Hate and Redirection of Real Problems

The anti-NRA people always amaze me. Recently the NRA was called a terrorist organization in a story involving one supervisor and the San Francisco city council.

One of the worst run cities in the country. Refusing to ask for federal help, I don’t mean money, as that doesn’t help.

Hate is not the answer, talk to the NRA. I bet not one member of the city council ever directly talked to the NRA about their concerns or have listened to their ideas and policies that could help them.

So, as a long-time member of the NRA, and Democrat, (35% of their members, your constituents are democratic members) you are calling me a terrorist.

That is the most ridiculous thing in the world to even think about. If anybody would really do their homework, the NRA is one of the most caring as it relates to second and first amendment protectors in the country. They have been trying to get people to look at the needs of the mentally ill, for years. There are lots of things they are for. They’re just waiting to work with Congress to get some things accomplished.

I do think there’s more things they should do. Maybe I don’t agree with everything they do, but I agree for the most part with what they do regarding gun safety, gun safety classes, protecting rights, and seeing that guns are in hands of the right people. We have such great laws out there now that, if they were ever enforced, we wouldn’t have near the gun deaths

But to call them a terrorist group is unbelievably naive. A lot of Democrats are NRA members. I am one. It’s not a Democrat or Republican issue. It’s not a gun issue. It is an issue of law-abiding people versus non-law-abiding people.

Why doesn’t anybody ever talk about the shooter? Where were the security guards in El Paso?

We talk about the guns instead of the shooters. The shooters are all mentally challenged at some level or another. No one in their right mind would do any of these things. Don’t forget, 90% of all gun shootings are pistols, not AR15’s.

I think that our efforts should be on education. If I have any criticism of any of the pro-gun people, including the NRA, it’s not educating the general population enough to not let the radicals dictate the agenda. Blame the media for this, they won’t get the message out. The Democrats have been defining the Republican party for 30 years because the Republicans and the NRA can’t get their message out on the liberal media.

I understand they have a huge challenge. The NRA does, the Conservative parties do. They can’t get any coverage because what they will cover is one person calling us a terrorist and a council that went along with her. This is just amazing to me how naive people are about what the NRA really is and what the NRA really stands for.

As for the totally failed San Francisco city council they need to communicate and find solutions by listening to all people possible before making uninformed decisions.

Hate rhetoric never works toward a solution, it only exacerbates it with negative results and no solutions. No hate No Violence hopes for honest respectful rhetoric. If you talk to your adversaries it can only improve the results, maybe not perfectly but better than hating just to hate.

Stop knee jerk reacting and start talking.

What are your thoughts?

Where Do We Go From Here?

THROUGHOUT LIFE, we’re all faced with the same existential questions that author Leroy Nelson examines in his thought-provoking book, “Answers To: Where Do We Go From Here?”

I’ve had the privilege of enjoying 25 years of friendship with the author. I am amazed at the incredible amount of information he has managed to pack into this well-organized read on a subject we all wonder about. I am sure this book will leave you feeling as good as I did when I finished reading and pondering the questions raised throughout the book.

“Answers To: Where Do We Go From Here” isn’t written just for older adults; the author’s calm and thoughtful voice speaks to everyone from their teen years on up. People of all ages contemplate but rarely discuss the important issues that Nelson brings to light. Is there a human spirit? If so, where does that spirit go when our bodies die? Is re-incarnation real? Is there a Heaven and Hell? These are questions all of us wrestle with as we navigate life’s ups and downs, its peaks and valleys, its triumphs and defeats.

One thing remains the same though, namely, no one person has the right answer for everybody. Though most people follow one of the world religions, every one of us has our own unique beliefs. And those deep-seated beliefs (including our faith) will either provide us comfort or distress when our time to leave this world comes.

It’s clear throughout Nelson’s writing that his main goal is to get each reader to examine their own faith, to test their own beliefs, and to be comfortable in whatever views they have regarding death and what, if anything, follows after.

He eloquently and thoughtfully provides insights from different religions, different scientific and medical figures, and ordinary people who have experienced extraordinary circumstances. His casual, yet witty style of writing allows readers to participate in what feels like a late-night chat with a long-time friend. As such a friend, he wants to draw us out on a topic most of us tend to avoid – our own death. That’s what friends do.

Lauren Pries, a former Director for nohatenoviolence.com, said that while reading this book she found herself fascinated not only by the incredible accounts of Near Death Experiences (NDE) but also found herself on a journey of looking introspectively and reflecting on a similar experience she once had. That’s how this book affected me too – it helped me look inside and examine my life in light of what I already sort of knew but wasn’t really looking at clearly.

It’s clear that Nelson has put immense thought into writing something that provides both an opportunity to learn about the various schools of thought and an opportunity to work through ones’ own feelings regarding death of the body and the extended prospects of one’s spirit.

Inquisitive, intriguing, and stimulating on a relatable level – “a call to caring not only about our own death but about our family and dear friends”.

Those words best describe this book for me, and I hope that you will experience the same joy, newly aroused curiosity, and sense of inspiration that I did after reading this deep-thinking author.

Patrick Lockhart, Founder https://www.nohatenoviolence.com

Thank You To Our Heroes

Today marks the 18th year for remembrance of the September 11^th terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center in New York and the Pentagon in Washington, D.C.

Four planes were hijacked by Al Qaeda terrorist killing all of the passengers onboard and thousands on the ground. It was a moment in history that we never imagined would ever happen since the attack on Pearl Harbor during World War II.

It is a moment in time we will never forget.

From that horrific day emerged a country united in patriotism. All of the first responders who so valiantly worked to save as many lives as possible were immortalized as heroes to everyone. We idolized them. They were our heroes.

We want to recognize and say thank you once again to all of the brave men and women who have survived to tell their story and to all of those who gave their lives to save others then and now.

You will forever be honored and respected.

And never forgotten.

We Can Do Better

I think the Democrats and Republicans could help us get back on track and away from all the negativity and hate if they would just lower their rhetoric. We can do better.

They need to reach across the aisle and work with each other. Have face to face conversations or debates away from the media. They need to focus on getting the right things done rather than what kind of exposure they can get for their own re-election. The more respected politicians don’t go to the press all the time. They’re too busy making things happen by actually listening and doing the work.

I get that the Democratic party isn’t always conspiring with the mainstream media. But they are definitely in cahoots with each other.

Their constant same rhetoric is teaching our children how to lie, deceive, never answer a real question, or give any real facts.

They don’t report the facts because it might not fit their narrative and it’s teaching our children how to do the same which creates hate. All of this anxiety is a source of depression, and bullying. A lot of these issues I blame on the politicians in general–parents who really aren’t doing the right job of parenting.

We need to teach our children to be curious about everything.

Not how to think. We are all responsible for raising our kids with good morals and as they say, it takes a village. Especially when it comes to single parents and at-risk youth. They need our help.

We as parents should demand from ourselves and our leaders, media, and teachers that we be better role models and examples. The way we’re acting right now needs to stop. Think about the future we are creating. What can we do to improve it?

Let’s stop talking and do the right thing.

Minimum Wage Was Never Intended to Support a Family

Minimum wage was never designed or intended to be a way to support a family. It was a wage that would get an employer to hire some unskilled labor and teach them about working; how to work, how to be organized, how to do whatever it is that they do to get a promotion, or a better job.

I think that we should look at doing something like guaranteeing raises for five years. Increase the minimum wage up to whatever the states think it should be, but each employee should get at least a $1raise per year for every year they work at the same company with the same employer up to $5 or five years. So, if you started at $10 in five years you’ll be making $15.

I wouldn’t do this with the states that have a really high minimum wage. Those higher minimum wages are hurting the smaller businesses causing them to have to cut back on employees or close. Look up states that have done this. It has hurt their employment.

Everyone always talks about minimum wage and not the average wage. At Walmart you would be at $22 after five years that’s what no one ever wants to talk about. They only want to talk about the starting wage.

Let’s make this what it was meant to be. A positive way for an unskilled person to get a job. Then, grow their salary by learning and working hard.

Bringing Tolerance to Religion and Politics

It can be easy to think that certain core beliefs are irreconcilable. You see it with religion and with politics: people are so strongly invested in their beliefs that it seems they’ll never work together.

But there is hope, and that’s by finding our common ground in avoiding hate and violence. You see, most people do not believe in hate or violence. It doesn’t matter whether you follow Judaism, Christianity, Buddhism, Islam, or atheism. It doesn’t matter whether you’re on the far right, the far left, or someplace in the middle. The majority of people simply don’t want to live around hate or violence.

It wasn’t always this way, and that change didn’t happen overnight. Take Christianity. It took centuries to move away from the ideas of the Crusades and the Inquisition, a move that’s still in progress. But armed with that big idea of no hate or violence, progress has been made and continues to be made to this day.

What happens if we take that idea and apply it to politics? Most people do not actively want violence or hate in their community and their country, yet we find it in our political and religious discussions.

We have to find a way to take the hate and violence out of our politics and out of our religious disputes. The only way to do that is to work with compromise and tolerance, or the old “give and take.” It might sound old-fashioned, but it’s stuck around because it works. If we’re trying to resolve an issue, then we need to work together. You help me on a bill, I help you on a bill, and in turn we help the people. It’s not entirely what you want and not entirely what I want, but it’s progress. And it’s done without hate or violence.

That’s how democracy is supposed to work. It’s how democracy used to work and how it can work again for everyone. No matter what your religious or spiritual belief, you want society to get better. Like most people, you want something that will help improve everything for everyone.

We need to share our similarities and celebrate our differences. The only way to get there is to embrace compromise and respect, and to reject hate and violence. If we all agree to work toward this ideology, then things would get better. For all of us.